Owner: U Suxxors URL:http://www.usuxxors.com Join Date: Mon, 06 Aug 2007 16:11:36 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: USuxxors covers random news from around the internet, mainly dealing with tech, gaming, or whacky subjects involving the two. Bonus rants about life on the side. Horribly drawn pokey haired characters for desserts. Site statistics:Click here
The Weirdest Game Nintendo Has Ever Made 2007-08-06 13:31:24 So I’m reading around Kotaku today that there’s this game that came out in Japan for the Nintendo
DS called Face Training. The point of the game is you use it to exercise your face which makes a little sense to me because how often do most people exercise anything on their face besides their mouths? Someone should give this to Jack Thompson so he can find a way to call it overly violent, we haven’t had a good laugh from our favorite attorney in awhile and I’m on a bit of a kick right now.
- Children could learn how to swing their heads and thus use their newly large and muscular lips to topple other children in much the same way a wrecking ball can be used to drop a large building. Kiss of death indeed.
- Toned eyelids could cause one use the power of air by fluttering their eyes in a rapid fashion, bowling over anyone in front of them. Female assassins in particular could make use this technique to blow men out of windows or off rooftops.
- A man who closes
Grand Theft Auto IV Delay Just Another Part of a Bigger Problem 2007-08-05 12:21:20 On Thursday gamers everywhere weeped as news broke that the latest installment of Grand
Theft Auto will have to be delayed until next year. The chance to play one of the most anticipated game of the year will have to wait due to what are essentially unexpected technical issues with getting the game ready for it’s simultaneous release on the X-Box 360 and Playstation 3. Take-Two Interactive said the game is now expected to come out sometime after February 1st.
In some ways this isn’t a bad thing, as while sales for the game no doubt would’ve been strong just based off it’s name alone, it was still coming out in the middle of a busy 2007 holiday release schedule that included Microsoft juggernaut Halo 3. The hype will be even greater after February, and gamers will have an easier time opening their wallets for a purchase.
The real issue comes from all the other hits Take-Two Interactive is taking on other fronts. Stocks are down. In March investors ousted fiv Read more:Delay
, Grand Theft
, Grand Theft Auto
, Problem
Bob Hoskins Also Regrets the Super Mario Brothers Movie 2007-08-04 13:54:07 I never realized how long ago the SuperMarioBrothers
movie came out until I saw this picture of Bob Hoskins. Wow. A quick check over at IMDB says it was released in 1993. I guess it was just a part of my life that I had attempted to block out. Junior high school, first loves, and horrible films. Good thing we have Lindsay Lohan to carry the torch in 2007, because “I Know You Killed Me” gave me the same feeling I had the last time I watched Super Mario Brothers; like I had just consumed a massive amount of shrooms, and I ain’t talking about the kind that make you four feet taller.
Oh yes, I was brave enough to sit through Mario Brothers not once, but twice. Just a few years ago in fact. A friend of mine had never seen it before and rented it knowing that I was a big video gaming geek. This was the movie we were going to watch that night. It was a chick by the way, which just goes to show you how romantic my evenings can get sometimes. Nothing gets the old l Read more:Regrets
Photos On The Internet Are Not Trustworthy 2007-08-03 21:35:12 Wanna know why?
Take a look at how this Photoshop artist takes a woman and turns her into a completely different looking person. Instant diet, instant plastic surgery, and even some new hair. Amazing stuff.
Probably NSFW due to the model having her butt toward the camera in the photo so open at your own risk. Hopefully Alberto Gonzalez doesn’t object.
Photoshop Artist Transforms a Woman Read more:Internet
Feds Raid Modders 2007-08-03 12:43:53 So Wednesday, feds raided over 30 business homes and businesses looking for people responsible for the sale, distribution, chip installation, and importing of various consoles including X-Box 360s and Nintendo Wii systems. These acts violate the Digital Millennium Copyright Act of 1998 of course, so after a yearlong investigation Federal Customs Agents decided it was time to make their move. Jodi Daugherty, the Senior Director of Anti-Piracy at Nintendo America, said that piracy losses for Nintendo and it’s designers and publishers may have reached the range of oh … $762 million dollars last year alone.
The names of the companies weren’t mentioned but they happened in Wisconsin, California, Florida, Hawaii, Pennsylvania, North Carolina, Idaho, Illinois, Maryland, Michigan, Minnesota, New York, Ohio, South Carolina, Massachusetts and Texas.
Part of me wants to start ranting furiously about this but frankly, you and I and anyone with common sense knows that piracy i
Barking Dogs - A Rant and a Cause To Support 2007-08-09 12:34:22 I was sitting around here this morning eating an apple for breakfast contemplating what I was going to write about today and then it came to me. A voice with all the answers. Well … actually it was a bark. A series of them. Loud, shrill, and constant. I’ve heard them since this morning when they woke me up around 6AM. I heard them while I was trying to look over emails and get some work on a few other projects completed. I’ve heard them pretty much all day.
So it’s time to rant, and I have a feeling what I’m going to say will be something that many people wish they could say to their neighbors. You know the ones. The ones that leave their dogs outside all day in the backyard so they can bark for hours at a time endlessly.
First, I want to give you an idea of my living conditions. I’m currently self employed. Making little money at the moment, but I expect it to rise soon and once it does I intend to move out of the home I’m living i Read more:Barking
, Cause
, Support
Live Blogging About Politicians! 2007-08-07 17:16:13 I have Hardball on because I’m bored and contemplating why the man many streets away must obsessively rev his bike for hours without end. They’re talking about the Democratic Presidential Forum going on tonight on MSNBC and it says that “Live Blogging
” will take place.
What exactly is Live Blogging?
Is this similar to when ESPN will tell you what’s going on in an overly priced boxing match after each round? Or when you listen to a baseball game on the radio and they’ll cover the action? The debate is free, so I guess this is just something you would need if you didn’t have cable. Maybe live blogging begins after the debate, but then it wouldn’t be live would it? Do we get to watch the bloggers blog? LIVE?!?
I’m trying to imagine how this works because it sounds absurd to me, and granted I’m in one of those moods today where I’m easily annoyed but I mean … do they just cover the “action”?
Blogger:
Reading Harry Potter Ninja Style 2007-08-10 19:16:14 There’s really nothing wrong with reading HarryPotter
. I’ve thought about borrowing a book myself to get an idea of what all the hype was about. However, there are those among us that feel a little tentative about taking a step into Harry Potter’s magical world and being exposed to his hogwarts. Reports are that some fans felt the need to go into hiding after a naked Daniel Radcliffe starred in a play featuring questionable horse related antics. Maybe you should stick to riding broomsticks Mr Wizard boy.
I should also mention that Radcliffe has a horrible looking ass. I’m only mentioning this because I just saw it while looking for a picture of him and the horse. I swear. It’s an old man’s ass. Not that I look at those either.
Don’t be afraid, ask yourself. Are you embarrassed to be caught in public reading Harry Potter? Does the very idea make you feel like less of a man? Inadequate? Does it induce a shrinking sensation within yo Read more:Ninja
, Reading
, Style
Feds Raid Modders 2007-08-03 12:43:53 So Wednesday, feds raided over 30 business homes and businesses looking for people responsible for the sale, distribution, chip installation, and importing of various consoles including X-Box 360s and Nintendo Wii systems. These acts violate the Digital Millennium Copyright Act of 1998 of course, so after a yearlong investigation Federal Customs Agents decided it was time to make their move. Jodi Daugherty, the Senior Director of Anti-Piracy at Nintendo America, said that piracy losses for Nintendo and it’s designers and publishers may have reached the range of oh … $762 million dollars last year alone.
The names of the companies weren’t mentioned but they happened in Wisconsin, California, Florida, Hawaii, Pennsylvania, North Carolina, Idaho, Illinois, Maryland, Michigan, Minnesota, New York, Ohio, South Carolina, Massachusetts and Texas.
Part of me wants to start ranting furiously about this but frankly, you and I and anyone with common sense knows that piracy i
Cat Teeth, Demolition & Dumpsters - A Random Personal Entry 2007-08-19 12:34:03 Normally I don’t like to go two days without an update. For that matter, I distinctly remember telling myself I wouldn’t do that because I wanted to put a lot of work into making U Suxxors a random blog about random things hopefully done in a humorous manner.
Of course, shit happens, like having to practically deconstruct my family home before putting it back together again.
The timing couldn’t be worse but what can you do. For three days we’ve been repairing the roof, tearing up carpet, and destroying furniture, putting the remnants into a dumpster that isn’t big enough to hold the absurd amount of crap in this place. The basement was full of broken splintered wood and rusted metal. Our parents never threw anything out for some reason, including old lumber and broken furniture. If I had a digital camera I’d show you the before and after. It was quite a sight to see. My office is based in this same house. I now have no oven & stove and a Read more:Demolition
, Entry
, Personal
, Random
Ninja Harry Potter Puts U Suxxors On Top of the World 2007-08-22 11:52:26 Well, on top of the world for the Google search term NinjaHarryPotter
, but it’s the first time in my yet ripe internet entrepreneur career that I’ve ranked number one for a search term that someone else has searched for. I don’t care that the term is one that people aren’t going to search for too often just … let me bask in my glory.
I feel good. I feel better than James Brown. Uh, when he was alive that is.
Which brings about the million dollar question: Why Ninja Harry Potter? Have you ever ran a website or blog and wondered why people search for the things they do? Of course you have. You’ve come across that one phrase or term that forced you to involuntarily ask yourself … why? Perhaps it’s filed in your brain right alongside the question “What’s the meaning of life?” Just what was this individual thinking at the time they entered that search term? Were they drunk?
My personal conjecture is that they we Read more:World
Organizing Your Home Office - Some Advice 2007-08-20 20:55:52 As you may have read in the previous post, I’m currently gutting my parents old house that doubles as my office / home. In the past day, I’ve done a little rearranging of items, some slight moving around. Figure there’s no sense in getting too comfortable because I’ll be moving everything upstairs again in a few days once we start the painting and floor cleaning.
This leads us to my first bit of advice. If you have a sliding desk chair, oftentimes despite what one might think it’s better to have a carpet under you rather than a hardwood floor. I learned this today when I removed said rug from the floor and found myself unable to control my sliding across the smooth surface. Now, I’m not talking about careening face first into a wall. That would be embarrassing. I’m talking about just sitting here readjusting my position and accidentally swinging my chair left or right crashing gracefully into one of my side tables within my desk area.
If Read more:Home Office
GI Joe - A Real Belgium Hero! 2007-08-24 22:38:10 Leave it to Hollywood to take a simple concept in the GI Joe Movie and mutilate it until it’s something completely different than it started off as.
It’s being reported that the Joes will be based in Brussels. Yes, Brussels as in Belgium
. GI Joe will actually stand for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, and they’ll be using the latest technological gadgets to battle an insane Scottish arms dealer. I’m assuming this means Destro which leaves me wondering if Cobra Commander is even going to be in the film to begin with. To top it off like a rotten cherry on a melted sunday, the film is said to look more like a spy film than a war movie.
I’m kind of stupified here so bear with me. I’m far from a crazed comic or cartoon fan and I understand that sometimes things need changed when carried over to film to appeal to a broader audience. Lets take Spider Man the Movie for instance. Really disliked it. I grew up a fan of Spider Man comics and wh
Halo Movie Turned Down in Favor of Monopoly Movie 2007-08-28 11:19:40 Ridley Scott, the same guy behind Alien and Gladiator, will be directing a comedy / thriller movie based on Monopoly. Yes, Monopoly, the board game. Let me repeat that for you. Not just a comedy … a comedy / thriller. About Monopoly.
Ridley Scott mind you is the same guy that is rumored to have turned down the Halo movie because he didn’t see enough plot potential.
This news is coming from quotes Scott made to the Los Angeles Times. IGN has the actual quotes and I want to copy them here so you can get the full effect of what Scott had to say about this potential Monopoly movie about the board game … Monopoly:
“Because clearly it ought to be humorous and for the family — the funny way it brings out, particularly when your uncle suddenly gets Park Lane and — in England, we have Park Lane, Mayfair and Barclay Square, what’s it in America? Park and Madison? So you watch people change. You’re witness to Jekyll and Hyde. Somewhere in th
Miss South Carolina Melts Down 2007-08-27 18:54:39 People have been talking about this Miss SouthCarolina
video all day that’s been floating around youtube and I guess it’s a part of the Miss USA pageant that I stopped paying attention to after I turned 14. I figured she incorrectly answered a simple question, but I just got done watching the video and … I have no idea what she just said. Miss South Carolina was asked the question “A fifth of Americans are unable to locate the United States on a map. Why is that?”
The correct answer of course is because a fifth of Americans are horribly stupid but that’s not why we’re here. This poor woman, and I will call her a poor woman because I actually feel bad for her, completely fell apart to a degree like I haven’t seen in some time. It gets to a point where you start to beg her to just shut up because she digs and digs a digs a hole for herself so deep she might as well go ahead and talk foreign relations with the head of China while sh
Michael Vick Finds God - Press Conference Transcript 2007-08-27 13:11:26 As many of you may have heard, Michael
Vick gave a press conference earlier today where he proclaimed that he had found God and was now on the path to redemption. I found Vick’s crusade heartwarming and decided to post the transcript in it’s entirety here on USuxxors.com as an inspiration to all of you. If you have committed a horrible crime, let these words from Mr. Vick be a beacon of light. You too can be forgiven, all you have to do is find God. So please, read the transcipt below with an open, welcoming heart.
“As many of you may know, my name is Michael Vick
and recently I have been in trouble with the law due to an illegal dog fighting ring that I was the ring leader of. It seems there’s a lot of evidence against me and if it turns out that I did something wrong, I need to seek forgiveness. I’m a man, and I’m going to hone up to my mistakes like a man does. That’s why I wanted to tell you all a little bit about my journey to find Read more:Press
, Press Conference
, Transcript
Larry Craig and Bathrooms - I Missed the Party 2007-09-02 18:57:30 After being gone since Wednesday thanks to more home repair shenanigans, I’m back to tell you it’s Sunday, it’s Labor Day Weekend, and I have absolutely nothing to write about. It’s like the world has died.
I could do a post about LarryCraig
, but the entire internet has beaten me to it by now twice over. Now that he’s resigned, the story is likely over and I fully expect him to disappear into the ether. I feel like I missed an opportunity to write about an important story and it saddens me. Almost feel as though U Suxxors as a whole has failed.
All I can do is hope that Larry Craig finds forgiveness, finds himself, and finds peace. We here at U Suxxors know a similar man, a man recovering from his own personal struggles who may be able to guide Larry Craig in a spiritual manner.
Related PostsNo related postsShare This
Read more:Party
CNN Gives Startling News In Relationship Study 2007-09-24 09:22:25 I want to share a letter with you all today. It is from an email I sent to CNN
following a recent report they reviewed on their morning show today.
Dear CNN,
Hello. I am a casual viewer of your news channel and today, I had my television on set to your station as I ate breakfast and read my email. Little did I know I would hear a report today so utterly fascinating and shocking that I yet feel I may suffer a delayed heart attack at some point during the afternoon. This is not a knock on you, but rather a compliment. If only other news stations could cover subjects that you show no fear in reporting. If only other news stations had your wisdom to look at important stories and not this silly OJ Simpson Mania that seems to have swept the media the past few years. I applaud your courage, forethought, and brilliance.
The two morning reporters who’s names I unfortunately don’t know were joined by an excited woman who you could tell straight off the bat was gushing with inf Read more:Relationship
, Study
MIT Student Walks Into Logan International Airport With Fake Bomb On Chest 2007-09-21 13:24:07 What is it with crazy college students lately?
A female thought it would be a great idea to walk into LoganInternational
Airport today with a fake bomb stuck to the front of her chest. When questioned later she claimed it was artwork and liked the way it looked.
Star Simpson, who can be seen to the right with what appears to be a shaggy blonde wig on her head, said she wanted to stand out. She succeeded. She also almost succeeded in getting a bullet through her head. According to reports, when she was questioned about the device by an airport staff member, Simpson walked away without answering. Police later caught up to her and she followed their orders to a T, which was a good idea as an officer later stated that the student is lucky she didn’t end up in a morgue.
I’m actually surprised she didn’t. If the bomb was real, can you really give a bomber time to notice you’re on to them? Can’t they just trigger the thing to go off immediately? Wouldn&r Read more:Chest
, Student
OJ Simpson Is About To Leave a Building! 2007-09-19 14:00:25 Let’s get back into the fun stuff. OJ SIMPSON. Speaking of, he’s getting out on $125,000 bond today and I don’t care because I expected that. The craziness I want to talk about today is the next gripping step in this tale of crime, drama, and ghosts of the past. The meat of the story, the here and now if you will. The big, breaking news story that all the major news stations are keyed in on, similar to when we all watched the cameras tuned into the skies over Iraq in 2003 as we waited for the bombs to start falling:
“OJ Simpson
Could Be Leaving Jail Any Minute Now.”
Yes, that’s taken directly from MSNBC’s breaking news graphic. and fairly soon I expect it to be changed to “Any Second Now” because it’s been up for about two hours as of this writing. This has nothing to do with him getting out on bond, we’re talking about the act of OJ Simpson walking out of jail. This is the important news story being covered at th Read more:Building
, Leave
Followup To Tazer Incident Article 2007-09-19 13:49:15 The article I wrote yesterday ended up getting some feedback, some agreeing with what I said and some that didn’t. That’s fine, opinions are opinions for a reason. People kept trying to turn it into some kind of deal where he was tazered because he was speaking against the government instead of getting into the real issue about him being tazered because he wouldn’t comply to officer orders but I can accept that. I will quickly follow up by stating that it’s coming out in the news today that Andrew Meyer was a bit of a crazy guy that liked to play pranks and what he did at the John Kerry rally was more than likely a publicity stunt. So anyone that thought he was on some kind of wacky free speech crusade and was subsequently held down by our SHADOWY GOVERNMENT OF BRAINWASHERS might just be wrong. He likes to spend his time standing on street corners holding up signs giving away Harry Potter spoilers to people who drive by him because he has some kind of weird Read more:Article
, Incident
Idiot Gets Tazered During John Kerry Speech 2007-09-18 12:16:05 Yes, I called him an idiot. I would’ve thrown fool, nitwit, and jackass in there too but I didn’t want to make the title overly long. I was thinking about ranting about that guy that said something about how it’s worse when a white person says bitch as opposed to a black person, but since I keep hearing the college kid screaming on every news station I put on today, he wins out.
In case you haven’t heard about this let me catch you up real quick. Kerry
.htm">John Kerry
came to the University of Florida to give a speech and take questions from students on Monday. Andrew Meyer, who is obviously an attention whore or just generally not that bright, came up to the podium and started asking Kerry wacky questions like why he didn’t contest the 2004 election, were Kerry and Bush members of secret society in Yale, and whether Bush should be impeached. He went on forever, not even allowing Kerry to answer his questions and after using his allotted time, he threw a temper Read more:Speech
Investigators Looking Into Contract Hit Ordered on Kevin Federline 2007-09-17 13:09:42 MSNBC is reporting on their news station that investigators are looking into serious threats that someone has ordered a contract hit on KevinFederline
.
A few months ago I would’ve figured it was someone that bought his rap album but now, who knows. This comes on top of a busy day Federline and ex-wife Britney Spears are having in court as their ongoing custody battle continues. A very large man who I actually mistook as a bodyguard at first is the secret witness that apparently can give the world confirmation that Britney Spears is a bad mother. I know, I had no idea either. The man may in fact be a bodyguard judging from how I just watched him block paparazzi by himself as he and Gloria Allred entered the courtroom. Maybe a former bodyguard of Britney Spears? The plot thickens …
My guess on the hit? The same as everyone else’s, I’ll say Britney ordered it. That would be quite the story.
I’m just glad it gives me something to write about that has Read more:Kevin Federline
Strange Search Terms - September 17th 2007-09-17 12:49:32 This week in strange search terms was almost ruined when after the server issues last week, our stats stopped tracking. Thankfully, the problem was solved and it appears the stats actually did track, they just weren’t showing. This is good because we’ve got a couple hum dingers~! that brought people to U Suxxors doors last week.
U Suxxors continues to get hits from various people looking for nude Vanessa Hudgens pictures, and I realize that every time I type that or a variation of it I’m probably encouraging more people to click us expecting Vanessa Hudgens bare naked boobs. While U Suxxors doesn’t have any topless Vanessa Hudgens pictures, we do hope that all of you surfers are successful in your hunt for nude and naked pictures of Vanessa Hudgens and her bare breasts.
Heh.
But seriously, it’s Hudgens, not Hudg for the one or two people that keep looking for her under that name. Are people just getting lazy or is that her ghetto street name and I just Read more:Search
, September
, Strange
, Terms
George Bush: Leave General Petraeus Alone! 2007-09-14 19:03:49 Rarely do I find myself commenting on YouTube videos and frankly I’ve talked about more political hooplah in the past week than I care to admit. Thing is, a few days ago I saw the Britney Spears fan video on YouTube and it disturbed me to the point I had to turn it off. Today, on some news channel I saw something much, much funnier. You may have seen it already but if you haven’t, you’re in for a treat.
I present to you George
Bush’s response to the attacks on GeneralPetraeus
this week in the media and at the hearings in Washington.
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a Building!Let's get back into the fun stuff. OJ SIMPSON. Read more:George Bush
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